Help Wanted

Hello fellow denizens of the Realms. I hope this day finds you well. Have you ever sat around and wondered what it's like to work for me? Well, wonder no longer! I find myself in need of hiring quality entertainment for Friday and Saturday evening at the upcoming Blackwood Tournaments for a variety of positions. Emphasis on quality. This gathering is King K's bachelor party, let us not insult him with sub par shenanigans.

The qualities I am looking for include but are not limited to: good hygiene, friendly demeanor, excellent conversation skills, flexibility, an attractive appearance, and of course the ability to entice the common pleb to enjoy themselves while relieving them of the heavy weight of their coin. Coin that you get to keep a portion of.

They say that if you love what you do you'll never work a day in your life. Whoever said that was likely independently wealthy and probably running some kind of illegal currency production in their root cellar. But if you are going to have to work it might as well be as enjoyable as possible. You can ask any of my employees and I am sure that they will tell you that working for me is quite the exceptional experience. I provide high quality entertainment for both the consumer and the seller and where else are you going to find such an exciting opportunity?

So, do you like money? Can you serve drinks? Can you liven up a room? Can you clean up after inebriated morons? Can you dance, sing, strum, or have other bardic leanings? Can you upsell? Can you look pretty while making insecure men feel good about themselves? Aren't you sick of not having enough money to dress better than that? Contact me privately and we'll talk business and specifics.

And for people who prefer to spend money rather than make it, I'll be seeing you soon as well. Come on down to the Thirsty Wolf and pull up a chair. And don't mind Trent, for once he wants you on his lawn.